the doubts never stop,
they’re ticking like a clock.
a conscientious sleeper.
dreams becoming meager.
questionable words.
as if you’re in your own world.
will i ever be free?
can you just let me be?
i am struggling,
i am juggling
the mysteries,
the girls with histories.
the stories you make up,
are the reasons i give up.
harmony.
Melody filled our hearts
But the words stuck like darts.
Love at first sight like art
But the path that leads isn’t so smart
I wish I could forget
This summer full of regret.
This winter I can not let
turn into a year not well spent
I was told that trust,
It was a must.
Our love once vital,
Now suicidal.
When the feelings rushed,
You left me crushed.
The pieces now,
Please show me how
I can’t allow,
Them to be flushed.
(ft. Jc smith)
beauty beyond compare.
it’s the wind blowing in your hair,
the words on your lips.
his heart truly can’t bear,
the sway of your hips.
you can take him,
to be yours.
another broken limb
hidden behind the doors.
the scars ,
the rushing cars,
the love we thought was ours,
comparable to the stars.
i’ll love him till the end of time,
he’ll always remember that he’s mine.
in the meantime,
i think i will be fine.
just remember me.
remember you said i am :
your lovely, carefree
your darling, charming
lover to be.
the one you recovered, rediscovered.
a lover, undercover.
blank.
there was a time when i knew
i knew you loved me,
i knew you thought the world of me,
i knew there was no one else,
i knew that every time we had the opportunity we would see each other,
i knew you would fight for me,
i just knew.
but now my heart is doubting.
my head is racing,
my feelings are weakening.
It is the blank message.
It is the short replies.
It is the way you don’t make eye contact.
It is the blank feelings.
we used to be.
we used to be best friends.
we used to have each other.
we used to have inside jokes.
we used to have our own language.
we used to have our own secrets.
we used to have our own friendship.
but now we are just simply old friends.
best friends, oh, that is what we used to be.
silence.
silence.
it’s louder than words.
it’s the things unspoken.
the distance in between.
the miles that tear us apart.
the words that are now empty.
the gestures that are now meaningless.
silence.
i can hear it.
i can see it.
i can feel it.
i find shelter.
in your heart.
in your bones.
in your words.
in your actions.
in your dreams.
in your fears.
in your love.
in your anger.
in your laugh.
in your cry.
in the way you live.
in the way you strive.
in you.
i miss you.
you are in a temporary rest.
i am in a temporary world.
its been some months over a year
but it seems like you are still here.
everyday i try not to cry
all i can do is try.
i want to be just like you,
and have a humble attitude.
i need you.
i love you.
i miss you.
april 7th 2015
the moon.
i think the moon and the stars tell us a lot.
the companionship between the two are the hope we can see.
most hope is in the faith of loyalty and grace.
the silence of the moon is the voice in your head.
the realization of everything you’re too scared to tell yourself.
the truth of all the lies you convince yourself to believe.
you are.
the one who opened my heart.
the one who opened my mind.
the one who i will one day open my eyes to in the morning.
the one who opened a new door in my life.
the one who believes in me.
the one who tells me to let my dreams be bigger than my fears.
the one whos actions are far larger than just plain words.
the one who holds my hand.
the one who holds my heart.
the one who holds my life together.
the one.
lovely lilac. 